This relationship is where romance goes to die.

A fairly typical conversation between me and Geoff…

*phone rings*

G: Hello?

K: Hey you!

G: Hey baby.

K: *laughs*

G: What’s up?

K: Not much. How was your day?

G: *large intake of air/cigarette* Busy. Busy, busy, busy.

K: Oh yeah? Who ruined your life today?

G: Fucking *insert name & story about work*. How ‘bout you? How was your day?

K: Good. I *Insert story and names/places/dates, etc…*

-momentary lull in conversation-

K: I missed ya last night

G: Oh yeah?

K: Yeah.

-lull-

K: Did you miss me?

G: *silence*

K: No, huh?

G: I’m sorry! * nervous laughter*

K: *laughs* Not even a little wee bit?

G: I was seriously asleep in thirty seconds.

K: *sigh* At least you’re honest.

G: Okay. Thirty. Thirty seconds, and I was gone.

K: Okay. Do you miss me now?

G: I’m talking to you now

K: Yeah, but are you missing me?

G:…I’m talking…to…you….

K: I know! *exasperation* Never mind.

G: Okayy…

K: *laughs*. You’re supposed to tell me that you miss me anyway.

G: Oh. I miss you anyway.

K: Geoff!!!

G: WHAT?

K: It doesn’t work after I tell you!

G: Oh. It doesn’t?

K: No.

G: Oh. Okay.

K: *laughs*. Okay, am I seeing you tonight?

G: I think so.

K: I know so. See you after work?

G: Sounds like a plan, baby.

K: Okay. Love you.

G: I love you too.

K: See ya.

G: bye-bye.


A fairly typical Sunday morning conversation between me and Geoff

*watching Boy Meets World where one character pines for his ex*

K: Would you miss me if we split?

G: *senses a trap and remains motionless*

K: Well?

G: Of course I would miss you!

K: Would you try to get me back?

G: I would like to think that I would…

K: …but you don’t know for sure?

G: Well, it would depend on the circumstances

K: Okay. Something stupid. Would you try to get me back?

G: Dunno. Depends if I could or not.

K: That’s the point in trying.

G: If it was something stupid, then yes. Yes I would.

K: What’s something not stupid?

G: I dunno…cheating.

K: Yeah. Cheating is unforgivable. But what if it was something like…I got tired of how much your job takes away from your time?

G: I would miss you…but I couldn’t really change the circumstances.

K: *staring daggers*

G: Well, I would like to say that it would change, but it wouldn’t! So how could I really win you back if that was a problem?

K: *more daggers*

G: Are you planning on breaking up with me because of my job?

K: Well, no…

G: Then why worry about? *laughs*

K: Because-

G: Hey look! Tv! *pulls Keltie back onto his chest, and rubs her shoulder soothingly*

K: Hey!

G: Uh-huh. *kisses top of Keltie’s head*

K: *grumble* Oh fine…



A fairly typical random night conversation between Keltie and Geoff

*darkness, in bed.*

G: I’m going to be asleep in like, three minuets.

K: Oh no you are not!

G: Watch me.

K: Uh-uh, buster. Talk to me.

G: What do you want to talk about?

K: Anything.

G: How ‘bout sleep?

K: Geoff!

G: Okay, so we’re playing this game now?

K: Yup. What are you thinking about?

G: Sleep.

K: Other then that.

G: Nothing

K: You going to take me to the zoo in the springtime?

G: Yes. I don’t want to put up with another winter of bitching.

K: *smacks Geoff* hey! *laughs*

G: *laughs. Spoons with Keltie*

K: You had better take me, mister.

G: I will.

K: Okay. Good.

-lull-

K: Hey Geoff?

G: Hmmm?

K: Which zoo?

G: Any zoo!!!! *mutters under breath*

K: Okay.

G: Okay.

K: Hey, Geoff?

G: Hmmm? *barely concealed irritation*

K: It’s been three minuets. I toldyaso.

G: *mutters and flips over. Laughs into pillow*

K: Okay, I just had to prove that there was no way I was going to let you sleep in three minuets.

G: Uh-huh…

K: Jeeze Geoff, would you stop talking? You’re keeping me awake.

G: *growls into pillow*

K: *giggles*. Okay, okay. Night, babe.

G: I love you, sweetie.

K: Love you too.

DISCLAIMER:

To all those reading this, and thinking that we are in the most dysfunctional relationship ever, don’t be fooled. Though there is very little romance on the surface, there are little things that we both say to each other that might sound like nagging, bitching, or whatever, but really means “I love you more then anything else in this whole world.” We are both very happy with each other, and revel in one another’s sense of humor. We were made for one another, and both acknowledge this fact on a daily basis.

And I’m offering 2:1 odds that I never get to go to the zoo.

Cheers!

Quote du jour
“If you have a dream about us going to the zoo together, I’m counting it.”
-Geoff